01.02.03 11:48pm

Keeping a New Year's resolution has never been this easy. Usually, I forget that I resolved to stop swearing around clergymen, or the person I resolved to stop bullying jumps off a bridge or something. Amazingly, I've been able to keep at least one of my resolutions (as listed in the 01/01/03 update), and I didn't even have to do anything!

Resolution #14, also known as "copying what John does," has had some help from my lovely neighbors here at Highpointe. (Those who have been following John's ordeal with a broken mirror will know what I'm talking about.) Upon returning to Lawrence after 11 days of holiday travel, I found that someone had generously removed the driver-side mirror from my pickup, and helpfully placed it on my tonneau cover for safekeeping.

Sure, I may have badmouthed them in the past, but I must say, our neighbors are some of the most polite vandals I've ever encountered. I can't wait to see what they do for us next. Maybe we'll come home to find our windows smashed and our carpets vacuumed! Or maybe they'll break down our front door and clean our tub! Lawrence, Kansas, you flatter us!

Seriously, you guys, I must say I am relieved that a broken mirror was the extent of the damages. I had been imagining a lot worse things happening to my truck while we were gone, so this isn't really a huge deal. Besides, now I get to add some bright orange Type R high performance mirrors with little blue LEDs in them that play that Kylie Minogue song whenever I use my turn signal.

So, this particular cloud does have a silver lining after all. And just think of how much closer I'll be able to pull into the drive-thru at the Krispy Kreme now!

01.01.03 5:00pm

Sean's New Year's Resolutions for 2003:

1. Lose 15 pounds. Or Euros, or whatever they're calling them this week.
2. Find out what happens when you use Nair & Rogaine simultaneously. On a cat.
3. Figure out why people can't understand that the FLASH DIRECTORY IS GONE so they'll stop e-mailing me about it.
4. Stop saying "Like, oh my gawd!" and "Grody to the max" so much.
5. Start smoking to make sure the tobacco companies don't go broke from all the people who resolve to stop smoking.
6. See actual girls go wild.
7. Catch the terrible, terrible people who stole our patio chairs.
8. Figure out what it is about David Schwimmer that I dislike so much.
9. Stop stalking Rebecca Romijn Stamos.
10. Start stalking John Stamos.
11. Spend less time trying to convince myself to go work out.
12. Start snoring.
59. Learn to count.
14. Make website funnier. (also known as "copying what John does")
15. Stop talking in chat room lingo. OMG!!!!!!! I M SO FUNY!!!!! LOL!!!!!!1
16. Get a handle on my attention sp

12.17.02 3:50am

12.14.02 4:38am

I am getting old. Last night, I was so tired after work, I went to bed at 9:30pm. Now, being a Friday night, I knew that I wouldn't be allowed to sleep the whole night, as it is mandatory for at least 13 people to stand outside our window and shout random obscenities and things like "woooooo" and "I dint eben know I dranked that many!" and "Well, I only met you tonight, but sure, I'll come home with you."

The fun began tonight when some member of the Lawrence brain trust thought it would be a good idea to throw mini pumpkins in the parking lot. So, like most every weekend night here, Sonja and I hid behind the miniblinds, cursing at idiots, and waiting for a bolt of lightning to come down from the sky and melt all the stupid people. Sadly, that didn't happen, but we keep hope alive.

Since Sonja has to be up in about 20 minutes anyway, I decided rather than keep her awake talking in my sleep about what color my feet are and how many race cars I should have, I will do what most internet geeks do and update my webpage. Am I not the coolest person you know? Right on.

Check out the reworked forum, the new contact page, buy me stuff from my wishlist, sign the guestbook, and read my first celebrity endorsement! (below) Also, any viewing problems with this page should now be resolved. If something doesn't display properly, please let me know.